It may be falsely claimed that we are displeasing Nitai by excluding the worship of Gaur by quoting the following verse spoken by Nitai in Chaitanya Bhagavata 2.15.69:
"Anyone who worships Me but does not worship Lord Gauranga, brings pain to Me. Such a person suffers birth after birth."
In the above verse, Nitai is condemning only those who do not worship Gaur but only worship Him with no faith in Gaur.
1. Let us first of all see how Gaur is worshipped. As per Jaiva Dharma by Shrila Bhaktivinoda Thakuar:
“Vrajanatha: Since Shri Gauranga is the original complete Absolute Truth, how should one worship Him?
Babaji: As one worships Lord Krishna by chanting the name and mantra of Lord Krishna, so one should worship Lord Gaur by chanting the name and mantra of Gauranga. One may worship Lord Gaur by chanting Krishna-mantras, or for that matter one may worship Lord Krishna by chanting Gaur-mantras. They are all the same. Anyone who thinks Lord Krishna and Lord Gaura are different is a fool. He is a servant of Kali-yuga.”
Presently, the standard for initiation in our Sadhu Maharaj Sanga is to do Nitailekhan and Hare Krishna Mahamantra chanting. You may object that as Gauranga’s Name is no longer being airwritten or chanted in japa, we have left out the worship of Gaur. As per the above quote from Jaiva Dharma, it is quite clear that one may worship Gaur by chanting Krishna’s mantra (krishna-mantre gaurapuja va gaura-mantre krishnapuja-sakalai eka).
So, Gaur’s worship is possible by the chanting of the Hare Krishna Mahamantra as authorized by Shrila Bhaktivinoda Thakur. Thus, nobody can say that we are worshipping only Nitai and not Gaur because we are diligently following Gaur’s most important order to chant the Hare Krishna mahamantra. Also, we are worshiping Radha Krishna in the topmost way by the japa and kirtan of the Hare Krishna mahamantra.
2. Nitai gets extremely displeased with those who perceive Him as independent of Gaur. That can be so displeasing to Nitai that He may curse someone to suffer birth after birth for that. We know that there were sects in Bengal who used to worship Nitai, Gaur, or even Advaita as separate Gods without paying attention to the relation they had with each other.
However, we perceive Nitai as the topmost servant of Gaur and His dearmost associate and brother. Nitai is our Prabhu and Gaur is Nitai's Prabhu. As long as we have this understanding of Vrindavana das Thakura in Chaitanya Bhagavata 1.17.153, there is no problem at all.
amara prabhura prabhu shri gaurasundara
e bada bharasa citte dhari nirantara
Nitai will never mind if we worship Him more as long as we accept in our heart that Nitai is Gaur’s dearmost servant and serves Gaur in many ways. Remembering Nitai means remembering Gaur and Radha Krishna as stated in Chaitanya Bhagavata. When we perceive Nitai as Gauranga’s topmost servant then Nitai is happy. And when we airwrite निताइ and sing His Name then Gaur is happy.
Thus, we are making both the Brothers happy. We know that Nitai is the Adi-Guru, the Guru of all Gurus. if He gets displeased with anyone then that devotee cannot advance an inch in devotion. In fact, one will lose whatever Bhakti one has. (yasya prasadad bhagavat-prasado
yasyaprasadan na gatih kuto 'pi).
However, our devotees are showing contrary results by getting more and more realizations, taste, and bliss in devotional service and harinam. And as Shrila Prabhupada says, phalena paricīyate: one's success or defeat in any activity is understood by its result. Therefore, it is a certain truth that Nitai is not at all displeased with us.
It is also important to remember that if one displeases Gaur, one can be forgiven by Nitai’s worship but if one displeases Nitai then even Gaur’s worship does not help, as stated by Shrila Jiva to Lord Nitai in Navadvipa Dham Mahatmya 4.34,35: