I had an interesting conversation with Nitai today.
I ASKED: Why don't you make me your pure devotee right now and let me experience the eight ecstatic symptoms of pure love for You to the fullest extent?
NITAI REPLIED: But then you will be so overwhelmed by that bliss that you will have no time to spread my Name globally on the internet and on the field.
I COUNTERED: But Nitai remember I am already doing that for you day and night! Ain't I?
NITAI SMILED: I don't want it to stop as you are finally on the right track now of truly pleasing Me!
I SUBMITTED: But Nitai isn't it high time for You to grant me that ultimate love of Yours which You gave to even those who were against it?
NITAI ANSWERED: It will come dear, in time, just be patient. Just work to spread my Name virally day and night and save millions of souls first. You are going to attain Me anyway after death so what is the rush to get My love right now! Do My Mission first and induce me in that way to award it to you!
I SAID: But what if you see the amazing results which come by Your causeless mercy and want me to go on even more after that!
NITAI ANSWERED: You just do your duty to Me and leave the rest to Me.
I CONCLUDED: Nitai, you can make me mad with Your pure love RIGHT NOW and still give me the strength to remain on the external platform to spread Your Name virally. All Your MAD Associates were able to do that. Though I know doing both is difficult, nothing is impossible for You! It will take You just a moment's thought to allow Your love to flood my soul. Please do it now Doyal Nitai! I am not asking for much at all. If not to me, then at least grant it to one of my disciples soon to show the world that YOU ARE REAL, and YOUR MERCIFUL NATURE IS REAL!
NITAI LAUGHED: Ok then, it will be done soon on my terms, when I decide it is the right time. You will get My love when you make My Name known to billions.
I fell down doing dandavats loudly crying Nitai's name and caught hold of His two lotus feet. His divine WISH is my only HOPE now!